Apollo's Notebook

The Grail

How could I have lost it?

I see people with so much, it spills from their pores,

leaving trails of gold behind them, wherever they go.

But I misplaced mine.

Maybe it's in that schoolhouse,

where I learned which colors, and textures, were wrong.

Or in the chapel I climbed to, with the last of my strength, to tell them:

'I can't do this anymore'.

And they laughed, and laughed.

And I cried, and cried.

I cried a stream, so my paper boat could carry me far from the chapel,

back to the dark apartment, I called my home.

I checked the bedside table,

thinking maybe I'd find it there,

sitting next to Smith, and a half a bottle of Jack, and Benny who never quite got me to sleep.

But there was only a clean spot, in the layer of dust, where it had been sitting.

It's somewhere I'm sure.

If I find it one day, maybe I'll know why they laugh, and dance, and sing.

Maybe, I'll feel what they feel.

#poetry